Even after your marriage ends, you and your ex-spouse should ideally still put your children and their needs above everything else. In an ideal world, the two of you should be able to work through your differences and present a united front as parents. This ensures that your children receive the love and support they need from you even after your divorce. It also gives them a sense of normalcy and consistency, which is essential in maintaining their mental and emotional well-being.
Unfortunately, exes do not always have a harmonious relationship after they separate. They may harbor ill feelings and resentment toward each other. Alienating children from the other parent may not be uncommon. Parental alienation can be deeply damaging for children and their relationship with the targeted parent.
Here are signs you should look out for if you suspect that your spouse may be trying to alienate your children from you:
Badmouthing and blame
Badmouthing the targeted parent and blaming them for the demise of the marriage is a classic parental alienation move. You may notice that your children suddenly have negative opinions of you – which may mirror those of your ex.
Creating conflict
Another sign that your ex might be alienating your children from you is if they constantly create or exaggerate conflicts in front of your children. This makes them scared or apprehensive around you. They might also hesitate to spend time with you or interact with you.
By making conflicts seem your fault, your children might view you as the “bad guy.”
Limiting contact
If your ex intentionally limits your communication with your children, they may proactively alienate them from you. Efforts to restrict contact may include blocking visitation times, not passing along your messages to them or creating obstacles that may hinder you from spending quality time with your children after the divorce.
Making the children dependent on them
Your ex may want to erase you from the picture as much as possible by making themselves your children’s primary source of comfort and support. Your children’s over-dependence on them might paint you as the less capable parent and create a rift between you.
If you believe your spouse is trying to alienate your children from you, you may want to take steps to address the issue. An experienced attorney can help you understand your rights and legal options.